Lost in confusion

Directionless - thats one word to summarise. Not meaningless but directionless. When you knew that you're doing things for a reason the focus is there. All a sudden, when that reason suddenly gets shaken the focus gets out of auto-focus. Therefore directionless.

Today was an awakening. That familiar tune before meeting the gang at meritus played again just now for the altar call. Once then i went up to ask for direction and direction was shown so clearly; even though the immediate set of days ahead was hard.

This time, the need for direction comes knocking again. We need direction at times because there are events and scenarios which aren't ours. We're merely caught up in it and more often than not, it's beyond our control. Having been placed in such situations, it's a life changing event and what we change into is greatly dependent on whether we ourselves take control or if we allow others to take control or if we allow him to take control.

Of all that was said today and all that was sung today, the 1 biggest question hit me. Why do we give and when we give, do we expect something in return? Parable after parable, everything was from the whole 2 month long journey that seemed like an eternity.

The story of the oil and the lamp, the talents, the workers and the vineyard. Individually yes they have their own storyline and teaching. Looking in totality, it means something else. It means much much more.

When you give, really give and not expect anything in return. Allow yourself and the gift to grow, don't just keep it. The underlying question still remains. To do in faith, or to do in hope? To do in faith for who and what? To do in hope for who and what?

This is the next phase of the journey. Though the graph has spiked downwards, what do stock analysts always say? When it's down, it can only go up.

So now the graph is down, it'll only go up. That's faith for now and in faith up it shall be.